Running from fear

Most everyone runs from their fear because they think that this will help them.  They make choices in the midst of feeling their fear and then, ironically, step towards and closer to what they actually are afraid of.

For example I used to work for the Internal Revenue Service in the collection department in the state of Florida.  When I chose an apartment I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to afford it.  When I quit my job I rationalized leaving because I was partially afraid of the responsibility gaining independence would bring.  I also didn’t want to end up like some of the clients that I regularly spoke to, “deeply in debt, broke, busted and disgusted,” as a former colleague phrased it.

When I left I ended up just like my clients, and I was in debt, and lost the apartment I was afraid of losing.  I  Running from your fear is a choice and we can hide from ourselves within our addictions, whichever way we chose to cope, or we can face the inevitable fear that calls us towards us, beckoning us.

Currently, I am experiencing a bit of anxiety as a write this article because it is leading me towards my own financial independence and this is my deepest desire and deepest fear of course.  I’d love to use food as my crutch, which I have in the past.  Choosing food however strengthens my personality and pushes me away from my long term goals.  Choosing to eat when I’m anxious never turns out well but choosing to go for a walk, exercise, buckle down in a project always turns out to be the better choice and the choice that my soul, or shall we call it intuition, would prefer.

What problematic coping skills do you choose when dealing with fear?